winter wind & iridescent days (MIHO)

[shirane katsuya]

Hopes and fears, oh try yourself

Katsu exhaled sharply and watched the white puffs of smoke disappear from the air. It was cold, but considering it was winter, he would like to be the optimistic person and say that it was actually warm. The sun was out but there was a chilly breeze that nipped at his ears. He could only himself further into his scarf and coat. The cold couldn't deter his mood though, he was excited to the point where he couldn't stand still. He was going to be hanging out with one of the members of the group, and the member being Miho only made him more ecstatic.

She had always seemed a little stiff towards him, but he brushed it off with the excuse that it was probably all in his head. Anyways, she seemed friendly and sweet and Katsu was the obnoxious type that would force his friendliest onto people, so of course he wanted to get to know her better. He had let out a shout of glee and hugged her in his excitement when she accepted his invitation.

The zoo seemed to be a good place to go, it was filled with animals and there was even panda bears. He got there early so he could buy the tickets in case there was a school outing or it became crowded later on, but due to his own idiocy early had meant an hour before the agreed time. Katsu had passed the time, leaning against a tree and humming to himself. Time ticked at a snail's pace though, as he checked his watch for the fifth time. He was happy to note that there was only fifteen minutes left to stand near the main gate. He fiddle with his clothes as he tried to make himself more presentable, though it was rather a futile attempt. His windswept, wayward hair refused to be tamed and he was dress simply a hoodie underneath his coat and comfortable walking shoes. He patted his pocket making sure the tickets were still there, and went back to waiting once more.

(NOTES) Sorry this took so long to get up ;A; Also I'm like forever bad at starting threads (so sorry about that, I seriously have to work on it orz;;

CODED BY DUCKIE OF GS

[Miho Hidaka]

How had it come to this?  There was usually little to no reason why one Miho Hidaka would ever want to spend time with other boys, no matter who they were.  Sure he did encounter ones he thought were cute, some that were a bit nice at first glance, but there was no denying one simple fact.  Boys made him nervous.  Miho spent every waking hour trying his best to achieve the dream of becoming a girl idol, and maybe a full girl at some point in the future.  Those hours where he had to be in school, amongst a sea of potentially hostile boys who would be merciless to him if they knew his secret, were terrible for him.  A real burden that he had great trouble bearing sometimes; it got so hard to deal with being surrounded by them all that he wanted to cry.  Part of the great part of being a member of sheeP was that most of the members were girls, and amongst them he could just be plain old Miho.

The exception was Katsuya, the only other boy in the group.  Rather the only official boy who was a member of sheeP, which was something that really puzzled Miho and had ever since his official signing with the group.  What were his motivations for joining a group that had been up to that point entirely composed of girls?  There was no denying that he really did have the talent to be an idol, though he might've been better served joining an official male group instead.  On the other hand sheeP needed all the help it could get in climbing the ranks of the idol world.  During their rehearsals, meetings and performances Miho had done his best to ignore or at least stay out of Katsu's way.  Being in the same group with a boy made him feel awkward and uncertain how to proceed.  So you can imagine his surprise when the boy had invited Miho to come to the zoo with him.

He wanted to find a way to say no, but there just wasn't any way to justify rejecting Katsu's invitation.  The more he thought about it the more he realized that as far as guys went Katsu was pretty OK by any standards.  Not mean spirited or chauvinistic, always kind of nice to Miho even though Miho kept his distance most of the time.  Would it really hurt to humor the boy's odd invitation?  Ultimately he figured it couldn't be all that bad to accompany his fellow sheeP performer to the zoo.  And as he tried his best to, Miho was early for their agreed-upon meeting.  Heck, he even had spotted Katsu hanging out by a tree and dressed pretty casually, which was a good sign that he didn't think this was a date.  That would've made things more awkward.  Granted it made Miho feel kind of silly for wearing his full seifuku uniform from a school near his actual one, acquired thanks to his mother's contacts.  It felt like he'd overdressed for a casual meeting at the zoo.  Still he had arrived, and he should probably say hello at least.  Katsu seemed oblivious to his existence.. and wait, weren't those boys over by the front gate from his school?  Their voices were so familiar, it had to be them.  Immediately he just wanted to get away from them, get somewhere that he might be more safe.  So soon he was up by the tree as well, the scant sunlight making the little flower hairpins he wore sparkle playfully.  Katsu at least was a known quantity.

"Um.. hi, Katsuya-san.  I'm sorry if I made you wait too long," he apologized, bowing slightly with the statement.

[shirane katsuya]

Hopes and fears, oh try yourself

He often wondered how he even became idol. When he was in high school he was content to just sit in front of the computer and sometimes dance around his room singing with the music videos. When he signed with sheeP it was a rather life changing experience. Yeah, it was a group composed of girls and it was a rather new group, but he took it in stride. He was new, and he loved the feeling of rising in the ranks with his fellow members, it gave him a sense of accomplishment. Katsu also couldn't say he was accomplished yet either, he had so much to work on and working with people who were learning allowed him to relax. It's also not as embarrassing when he becomes a living action figure capable of a few poses in front of camera, because his skills as a model is nonexistent.

That could also explain his reason for wanting to be friends with all of them. He wasn't so oblivious that he couldn't tell how he and Miho rarely bumped into each other. In fact, Katsu had to actually hunt her down one day just to invite her along with him. When he looked back at it now, he realized it would have been incredibly awkward if she turned him down. Of course, he's a rash person and act first and think about the consequences later. Well, it wasn't like he was inviting her on a first date (if he was there would have been more stuttering and flustered flailing because frankly he was shit at those sort of things), so perhaps he would have just smiled and waved it off and said maybe next time.

"Um.. hi, Katsuya-san. I'm sorry if I made you wait too long."

He snapped out of his thoughts, and looked to where the source of the voice came from. He gave a wide grin and an enthusiastic wave, "Miho-chan!" He said, drawing out the last honorific with a slight sing-song lilt to his voice. Usually with his friends he would be hugging them unabashedly without a single thought, but he restrained himself. He wanted her to like him and not think he was a class A creeper.

"Don't worry I was waiting long at all!" That perhaps was a partial lie. He had been waiting for a while, but it was due to his own eagerness. "Anyways, the invite was so out of the blue and in the winter too so it's really my fault," he said, giving a slight huff of laughter and ruffled his hair in the back of his head, because really who goes to the zoo in winter?

He stood up fully from where he was leaning on the tree and made his way to the check-in. He realized standing at his full height, he was only a few inches taller than Miho which made him pout slightly. He was always rather short but he certainly never liked getting reminded of it. Katsu shook his head slightly getting rid of what he deemed as an unpleasant thought. "Ah, how's school?" He asked, small talk is was always his forte and seeing as Miho was dressed in her school uniform it seemed to be a suitable topic, even if he himself didn't really like school all that much.

(NOTES) Gah, I'm so sorry about everything. x.x I've been getting ready for my music competition and it's slowly eating away my muse, but you defiantly deserve a post before it's completely gone. Katsu should probably be using -san, but he's such a rude informal person;;;

CODED BY DUCKIE OF GS

[Miho Hidaka]

 Miho couldn't help blushing when his badmate grinned enthusiastically and called out his name like that.  Drawing out the '-chan' made it sound like they were closer than they were, but somehow Miho didn't mind too much.  Yes there was a certain degree of awkwardness involved but at least he did know Katsu enough that it wasn't totally unwarranted.  Even though they hadn't spent much if any time together outside official sheeP functions Miho did have some idea of how the boy tended to great friends.  This made him very happy and undoubtedly relieved that there was no hug involved in the greeting.  Hanging out with a boy alone was already taking a lot of courage from Miho.  If someone hugged him it would probably simply overwhelm him, maybe make him faint.  And the last thing he wanted when he was out and about as Miho was to be taken to a hospital where he might be found out.  Just doing things with another person could be really dangerous for your career!

"Oh, it's okay, Katsuya-san.  It's not like you can control the weather, you know.  And in the winter aren't there less people going to the zoo?  That means we have it more to ourselves," Miho responded with a smile, trying to make his bandmate feel better about the invite out of the blue.  Katsuya really wasn't a bad guy, so it wasn't good to see him feel down on himself.

The question the other boy asked him made Miho blink and look confused at first.  There were a lot of things to talk about, probably, like being an idol or music that they liked, but school?  That was something that Miho never really talked about with people outside his family and even then it rarely came up.  Granted he was of the right age to be in school so asking how his academic life was going wasn't totally out of the question.  Somehow from Katsu he'd expected something a little different than this topic.  Which was about the point where Miho remembered he was wearing a seifuku.  Now it all made a lot more sense.  He blushed again and tried to think of how to respond.  What could he say without giving away too much about true school life?  A glance back at the boys from his school - they were going through the front gate now - and the less he wanted to talk about it.  One of them, he thought, noticed him and.. made a catcall.  There were other girls about so it was probably directed at them, but still!  Instantly Miho did something he never thought he'd do: he slid over and latched onto Katsu's arm, half-hiding behind the boy for protection.  All the while he looked a little embarrassed.

"Um.. school's.. school.  It's not very exciting and there are some people who are kind of mean to me.  But nothing that we need to get worried about right?" Miho finally answered, managing to partly come out of hiding and look up at his slightly taller comrade, "I'm not in any clubs or anything, so I have a lot of free time.. do you have any hobbies, Katsuya-kun?"  Just like that the less formal honorific slipped out, and Miho blushed like a boiled lobster.  Quietly he corrected himself, "Katsuya-san?"

[shirane katsuya]

Hopes and fears, oh try yourself

"Miho-chan is so sweet and understanding!" He said, no filter from his brain to mouth. The said filter seemed to be almost non-existent when he was worked up about something as well. Ahhhh, I really should think before I speak, he thought, wincing at how eager he sounded. He wanted to make Miho happy and perhaps prove that he wasn't that bad of a person to be around.

He almost jumped at the sudden contact, instead he let out a small yelp of surprise. He looked down at Miho, his eyebrow raised and head tilted. She didn't exactly seem like a person who likes physical contact all that much and it was even odder that she would be the one who initiate it. Katsu didn't say anything, instead he chose to look around to see what was the source of the problem. She wouldn't have grasped his arm without any reason, right?

His mind continued on that train of thought for a few seconds, before coming to a screeching halt. He stopped trying to look for this elusive source and stopped walking. He turned around to face Miho, his face for one once schooled into a serious expression. "Are kind of mean? I'm not going to make you feel uncomfortable and push it, but Miho-chan you can tell me anything okay? I know we aren't close, but I promise I'm a good listener!" He gave a large smile. Katsu was perfectly serious about what he said as well.

He gave a small sigh, but continued to walk once again. "I'm part of the go-home club, but I like to cook," he said, following through with his promise of not pushing it and simply continued as if nothing happened. He was usually free after school, and he didn't want to join any clubs when he wanted to focus on music and sheeP. It wasn't that big of a problem though as his friends were willing to hang out whenever they were free. School and classes were another can of worms. He wasn't very good at focusing, nor was his brain willing to allow him to learn.

He could feel heat well up around his cheeks and base of his neck when he heard Miho change honorifics. "Kun is fine! We are group members after all," he said, his voice slightly teasing in tone.

(NOTES) This took so long ;A; I'm so sorry!

CODED BY DUCKIE OF GS

[Miho Hidaka]

Miho couldn't himself believe that he'd latched onto a boy of all people, even if there were classmates nearby whom he knew didn't care much for him.  Katsuya was a nice guy and trying to help, at least Miho thought he might be.  On the other hand making himself get close to boys was really trying on the sheepish idol's nerves.  The fine line between knowing that Katsu was being his own version of supportive and what Miho was comfortable with was very thin indeed.  Somehow it actually felt OK to be clinging to the boy for protection against people Miho would really rather not deal with.  If people thought they were on a date or something so be it.  That last possibility certainly wasn't helped by the fact that Miho blushed when his groupmate heaped some praise upon him for being so sweet and understanding.  That wasn't helping his ability to talk to the boy any, as Miho still struggled to find words that'd be suitable for conversation.

"Um.. well, it's really nothing.  Just a few bad apples, and you can't get along with everyone right?" Miho replied to the Katsu's concerns over other kids being mean to him, "They kind of think I'm worth picking on for some reason.. I think because I'm small and I don't want to attract attention to myself at school.  It's such a relief when I get to go home or we have a group event!"

Then he blushed again when Katsu suggest that Miho just use the more familiar -kun honorific.  Really?  Miho felt like he barely knew the boy and certainly not well enough that referring to him as Katsu-kun would be acceptable.  Then again the boy did call him Miho-chan, so it was actually not that much of a stretch based on their relationship.  Distant as it was they were group members and Katsuya's nature was to be casual with people he knew.  Taking a deep breath Miho figured he might as well do his very best to make an effort to meet Katsuya's attempts to be friendly.  As they made it through the front gates of the zoo Miho glanced to Katsuya and managed to make himself smile.  Was this really so bad?

"Well.. Katsyua-kun.. you're not in clubs either? That's odd, I'd think any club would be happy to have someone friendly like you as a member," Miho said, feeling a bit shaky about whether this was good conversation or not, "If my school had a kimono club I'd probably be the president of it.. but that's not really the kind of thing that's popular there. And being interested in traditional things like that would probably just get me picked on more."

[shirane katsuya]

Hopes and fears, oh try yourself

Katsu never blinked twice at physical contact. It wasn't rare that he would have a friend of his whacking him across the head because he was "too close" and "Katsuya-kun you're not my boyfriend". Overbearing personality and being hyperactive had caused him to make more acquaintance than actual friends. He was fine with it, because he people who he was friends with, were close.

"There's no reason why you should be picked on. I don't think anyone should be allowed to do that! Even if I don't get along with everyone I meet, I try to ignore them not hurt them. I'm happy that you can find safety with the group though!" He said, trying to end his statement on a happy note. He didn't know how to word to convey his words completely. He never got bullied, pseudo-self confidence made sure of it. The happy airhead who probably wouldn't even know you were teasing him. Katsu couldn't speak from experience, but he at least tried to convey his own emotions and opinion.

The fact that Miho relented and used -kun made him oddly happy. He thought perhaps she would refuse. They were, after all, not that close. The fact that she was reaching out to him only strengthen his drive to become friends with her. "I use to be in the cooking club, but my mother wanted me to focus on my studies and I have group responsibilities to attend to as well. A lot of my friends did try to get me to join their clubs though!" Really, he took his role as an idol seriously, even if it was the only thing he would ever take seriously. "Ah, that's so cool Miho-chan! My mother has a few kimonos and they're beautiful. It's okay to be interested in traditional things isn't it? They are fascinating!"

He handed the tickets to the lady in the front gate, and they were admitted in without a problem. "Do you have any animals you want to see first?" Katsu asked, a grin on his face from the excitement that they were in a zoo.

(NOTES) orz;;;; I love Miho though ;u; He's adorable!

CODED BY DUCKIE OF GS

[Miho Hidaka]

Oddly as they walked into the zoo proper Miho didn't feel too out of place being at Katsuya's side. Probably because those classmates were still in the immediate area, laughing loudly about something and exclaiming to punctuate the subject. Miho actually cringed a little when he heard the tone, though the words were indistinct. All that served to do was make him huddle closer to the other sheeP and tug on Katsuya's sleeve anxiously. Others might've swatted Katsuya away with 'you're not my boyfriend' or something but Miho thought maybe people seeing them together would keep bullies away. Or something. Certainly it was safer in someone else's company. Miho made a point of turning away from where he'd heard the laughter come from and focused on Katsuya instead.

"Well I think it's because I'm small and at school I'm afraid to attract attention to myself. I just kind of let them do it because I don't want people seeing me and recognizing me as an idol... I want to keep my idol self and my school self separate. Besides the people who pick on me are kind of idiots anyway, so it's not possible to reason with them," Miho responded to Katsuya's statement about the bullying problem, "I don't have any friends at school so I really look forward to sheeP events, even if it means a lot of extra work. The ladies at my mom's store are really nice too."

His eyes lit up when Katsu actually expressed interest in traditional things. A lot of people their age didn't care that much so Miho was pleasantly surprised at the news. Again the thought that Katsu wasn't so bad crossed his mind. Rather quickly Miho's inhibitions were dropping because of how relaxed the feeling of hanging out with Katsuya was. Miho giggled at the statement about how fascinating traditional things were.

"You're definitely the rare person who actually thinks that way, Katsuya-kun. Most people our age don't really care that much," Miho said happily, clearly in a better mood talking about this subject, "I actually model new designs for my mom's store sometimes, so that I'm promoting the store and sheeP at the same time. At least that's what I'd like to do."

"Not really.. maybe the bears?" Miho responded to the question of what he wanted to see first. The animals weren't as important now as getting to know Katsuya; suddenly Miho felt awfully and oddly fascinated by the boy. Still holding onto Katsuya's arm he smirked as he asked, "So can I ask you a question, Katsuya-kun? As a fellow performer? Honestly you seem like a really nice person.. what kind of.. um.. girls do you like?"

[shirane katsuya]

Hopes and fears, oh try yourself

He felt the slight tug on his sleeve and figured they loiter enough in front of the crowds. "Pff, you're almost the same height as me. Of course, only an idiot would bully you, I don't see any other reason why someone would. If anything ever happens, you can tell me okay and I'm sure everyone else in the group would say the same thing. Even if I'm not in the same school, I'll figure out something."

He wouldn't say he knew much about traditional wears, but they were certainly nice to look at and he did like history class. "Ah, I think they're neat I guess? They're one of the things that lasted for so long even while we're moving forward? If that makes any sense." It was interesting to see where things have come from, everything progressed off of something else, and Katsu thought it was important to never lose the things that have been deemed "traditional", they helped shaped the world that they lived in and the culture they had. "I think I remember seeing you wear them some of them, they look really nice! You're really good at modeling then, I can't do it at all. I like wearing almost the same thing all the time because it's comfortable," he said giving a small laugh at his own words. Honestly, he should probably look into being "stylish", but he felt uncomfortable with wearing things he wasn't use to. Just another goal to achieve to become a better idol! He thought, cheering himself on.

He had been to the zoo a few times, and already knew where the bear section was. He was pretty sure they even had panda bears, and hey everyone loved panda bears right? He stopped walking once he heard Miho's question. He thought it would be something like 'what's your favourite ice cream flavor?' or 'what do you think about being an idol?' not what type of girls you like. He could feel the base of his neck heating up and he didn't doubt that it was flush red as well, he could only hope that he wasn't blushing as well. "Uh, I don't know...I guess a nice person? As long as I can be happy and they can be happy and we have fun? Ahhh! I don't know!" He managed to splutter out, his hand instantly rubbing the back of his neck.

Katsu wasn't exactly someone with experience in the romance area of life, nor could he say that he had a "type". He had his small crushes before, but they were far apart and they usually were for celebrities. He couldn't even flirt and everyone he knew were simply friends in his mind. "Ah, my turn, does Miho-chan have a type?" He asked, still recovering from losing his cool, which by the way, was really embarrassing.

(NOTES) yay for procrastinating on school work BD

CODED BY DUCKIE OF GS

[Miho Hidaka]

"But.. most of the people who pick on me are bigger than me. There's actually a good number of bigger kids at my school who seem to have nothing better than to make my life miserable. But if I raise too much of a fuss all it does is get me picked on more later, and I don't want to attract too much attention to myself. That might make the group look bad, right? Or at least distract people from our music, which is the important thing," Miho responded as they walked deeper into the zoo and away from the offending laughter, "It's okay, though, because I'm usually able to just be quiet and keep my head down. If I don't stand out I don't get noticed. And if I don't get noticed I don't get picked on. There's absolutely no need for you to get involved in this, especially when you must have your own schoolwork to focus on! Besides in a couple short years I'll be free of them forever!"

Even pretending it was fine fell flat because Miho knew for a fact that it wasn't okay, but there wasn't much he could do about it. His friend here thought he was a girl. If Katsuya came to Miho's real school it would be a disaster on all fronts which Miho might well not recover from. The idea of his bandmate storming to the rescue during an incident of hazing by upperclassmen was actually kind of funny. Or it would be were there not the horror involved with it being an all boys school and Katsuya finding out the cute girl he'd come to save was actually a boy. That would be far more trouble than Miho felt like dealing with, so it was best if Katsuya just kept his distance and let things play out as they would. Actually Miho appreciated the offer, and weirdly the boy was starting to grow on him.

"Oh, you're so kind, Katsuya-kun! I just have lots of practice and my mom's a great teacher for that sort of thing. And what you said makes a lot of sense - kimono have a timeless quality to them that remains just as potent no matter how forward in time everything else has moved. A classic elegance that simply can't be found in regular garments," Miho remarked cheerfully, happy to have something so familiar to talk about, "But there's something to be said about wearing things you're comfortable in. I actually prefer to wear things that are just comfy when I can, even though I do really like kimonos as well. For me it's more like pretty skirts and tops, maybe dresses, that make me most comfortable.. anyway, I think you've got a good point, Katsuya-kun."

Headed towards the pandas, Miho wasn't sure why he'd asked Katsuya that particular question. It'd just come out as he started to acclimatize himself to Katsuya, which itself was turning out to be oddly easy. Never before had Miho been this calm around another boy. He was still holding onto Katsuya's arm as the boy struggled for an answer while blushing. That made Miho giggle despite knowing how tough it was to be put on the spot like by someone. Then the question was turned right around at Miho, and it was the darker haired youth's turn to laugh nervously and rub the back of his neck. Boy, it was a lot harder when you were the one who had to answer it. Miho found himself blushing as he finally managed to string enough words together in his mind to provide Katsuya with an answer.

"Um.. well.. hypothetically.. they'd have to be... nice, funny, fun to be around.. and able to accept me for who I am. That's got to be the hardest part.. but if they can do that, I'd be theirs. If I could date," Miho explained, blushing as he completed his answer. Before Katsuya could get a chance to ask any probing questions Miho perked up and added, "So, Katsuya-kun, what's the hardest subject in school for you? Mine's math.. I just get so bored because most of the equations seem totally useless in real life."